Children and On-Set Gun Safety: 3 Ideas for Not Getting Evicted or Killed this Wednesday

You know those moments when you’re sure that you’ve lost everything?

I was shooting in a school setting for the ill-fated web series Homeschoolers vs. Zombies. My teenagers had very realistic-looking toy guns. Someone got distracted and left one in a hallway. A small child picked it up.

I wasn’t even there. I found out about it when a former student brought the gun to me and told me what happened. I was dizzy with horror. I was facing the loss a whole year’s project, because of one mistake.

Want this to not happen to you?

I’ve learned a lot since The Great Horrible Gun Scare of 2012. Here are the steps we take to make sure that when children and guns are mixed, all we get from the mixture is good film and cupcakes.

Not Getting Killed or Evicted Action #1: Use Fake Guns.

This is super important: When you’re filming, make sure you are using a “gun” that cannot possibly kill anybody.
Some actors are idiots, and often, you don’t know which ones till you’re actually working with them.

I buy airsoft, and then I break the airsoft, because you could put your eye out, kid.

Not Getting Killed or Evicted Action #2: Always Treat Fake Like it’s Real.

If someone who doesn’t know what’s going on sees your actor holding a weapon on your set, they need to see that weapon being held properly, with good trigger discipline, and never jokingly pointed at anyone.

Creating a realistic relationship with the prop is good for you, good for your actors, and good for your crew.

Everyone on set who doesn’t need to be committed should be treating your very fake guns like they are very real killing machines.

Not Getting Killed or Evicted Action #3: Get a Weapons Wrangler.

Your weapons wrangler should be someone with gun experience and personal authority, who takes fake-gun-safety as seriously as you do. This magical individual will:

A) Teach your kids (and/or adult actors) to treat the fake like it’s real.

B) Keep track of your gun(s) at all times and, during downtime, keep them out of the hands of the actors (and out of sight).

C) Keep an eye out for crowds of non-authorized individuals and throw him/herself between unauthorized eyes and the gun.

Choose this person well. Then, love this person. Feed them pizza. Weapons wranglers are wonderful, kind, intelligent, sensitive, attractive human beings that you want on your film set, and they’re also good at parties. I’m marrying mine.

About my disaster: I found the school board (conveniently convened), so I could personally apologize and do any fixing I could before I was sent away to film Siberia. Then, the most strange and wonderful thing happened. I was not fired or evicted or, somehow, even scolded. Thanks to one very vigorous woman on the board, I was given a lecture on the folly of being freaked out by toy guns.

A situation that could have blown up in my face was averted because there are some really, really chill people in this world, and somehow they trusted me not to get everyone killed, even when I’d messed up.

May you never need to be as lucky. May your gun-wielding children always be capable and serious. And may the odds be ever in your favor.

And next time maybe do swords. Can we do swords?